Journalling + the relationship with self.

Hey gal,

I know self-love is a topic that can be a little confusing sometimes. We’ve all heard the message about how this mystery goodness can have next level impact on our relationships, goals, health, career and life in general. But, in a noisy content overloaded world - how do you know when you’ve got it right? How can you be sure you are living in alignment with your values? When do you know the voice your hearing is actually you and not just something you saw on your newsfeed last week?

Enter journalling. This babes is a tool I’ve been using for as long as I can remember. It’s a way to block out the world and really get clear on your truth. Depending on my situation I’ll choose one of four different ways of journalling to help me tackle a problem. Yes, you read that right. Four different ways that have been helping me live my best life for the last seven years.

Grab yourself a drink gal! I’m about to let you in on all four.

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Enquiry

Ever find yourself torn between two options? Made a decision you’re not 100% sure on. Wondering why you’re so caught up in a situation that shouldn’t even matter to you … but somehow it does? Gal, I suggest you test out enquiry.

It’s simple. You ask a question. Like literally write that baby on the top of a blank page. It could be anything from:

  • Is becoming a lawyer truly what I want?

  • Did I make the right choice by going into business with my friend?

  • Is this relationship right for me?

  • Should I quit my job and pack my bags for Bali?

Now let your pen free flow. Don’t think too hard about what’s coming out the page. Let your pen go. You might even find you end up on a totally different topic. That’s totally OK. It could be there was something a lot more important for you to uncover.

You’ll know when you’re done gal. An answer will find it’s way on your page. You’ll realise something or there will just be a moment of completeness. Give it a go and let me know how you get on!

Intention

So, let’s say you’re about to walk in to a situation that kind scares you. Think asking for a pay rise, calling your friend out for saying something that hurt your feelings or asking that age-old question ‘what are we?’ It’s only natural for the mind to go to worst case scenario. Setting an intention gets your head out of a funk and into a higher space. So much better for the soul!

When Prepair NZ was an idea I literally wrote so much of what it is today down as an intention. You can bet your dollars gal that everything in my notebook is what you interact with today! And gal you can have that too. It might be your ultimate dream, vision for empowering women or maybe … this is an opportunity for you to get really clear on what the perfect partner would be like for you. How do they align with your values? What is important to them? How do you support each other? How do you feel?

All I want you to do is write about a situation as though it has happened already. Capture all the little details. Maybe what you’re wearing? How it feels? How do people react? Keep writing until you feel a bit excited. (yes, for real.)

Now, message me the minute one of these things comes to fruition please so I can celebrate with you!!

Reflection

This is a great one for my gals working through a break-up or still needing to settle some old stuff from a past relationship. A time to reflect not only on what was shitty but maybe what was really good too. Most importantly use this as a tool to help you reflect on YOU. It shouldn’t be an exercise of focusing on all the things that went wrong or what someone else did or didn’t do.

Take the time to notice some things about you. Who were you then? What did you accept? What could you forgive yourself for? What are you proud of yourself for? Were there times where you let yourself down? What would you do differently?

Again, just write. Get it all out on the table. You’ll be surprised the kind of release you get.

Free writing

The title really speaks for itself. Just open your journal and write!

Honestly, sometimes I just write about the weather and before you know it I’ve figured out what colour cushions to buy for our couch. Or, I dig up some stuff I was feeling in my relationship that I didn’t realise was annoying me. Like how I really don’t understand why there are socks in random corners of my house?! Other times I walk away with a to do list and a much clearer mind to tackle the day with!

There’s no special formula to this gal. No checklist required. Just you, a quiet space, pen, journal and maybe a good snack.
Do it on the train, bus, waiting in a queue or elevator. The notepad on your phone is great too!

All you have to do is give it a go. Make sure you let me know the outcomes xx

Irene Wakefield